BRONZE BUDGET BRIDE

Evidently long ago across The Pond, someone in Italy or France decided that it was a great idea to give guests at weddings or birthdays (or funerals, who knows) a crystal box with something delectable inside.  Supposedly, a wedding was considered a lucky event back then; however, I would've thought a bath would rank higher on the list.  A bonbonniere (translate to the 21st century - bon-bon) was a way for the bride and groom to "share" this luck or blessing with their guests.  And therefore, another tradition which costs the bride money and goes into the trash was born.

Don't get me wrong; I'm not completely against favors.  In fact, I think when they are done right, they can add an additional element to the wedding that makes it that much more memorable for everyone.  But let's be honest; how many of you still have any of the "favors" you've received at other people's weddings?  Or better still, how many of you can remember what they were (without sniggering to your girlfriends about how awful they were)?  I received a beautiful silver frame with a picture of the bride and groom in it once; considering I was a date of a friend and had no clue who these people were, I was perfectly happy to remove their picture and use the frame for the next two months until the silver rubbed off and the plastic stand broke.  But it got me thinking - how much did that poor girl spend for these frames as a token of their special day that went to people they didn't know, or worse, were thrown in the trash?

I can't tell you how many plastic swans, tiny champagne glasses and cheesy heart-shaped banks I've broken or given to my friends' children.  As I was cleaning up the bubbles that burst in the back of the car where the small bottle was thrown after the last wedding I attended, I realized: these things are supposed to have meaning.  So, let's put the meaning back into them!

Granted, they shouldn't be something that is obscure about the couple that absolutely no one but their therapist would know what it meant, but it should be something that those who know them well will say, Yeah, that's 'them.'  My husband and I were married the day before St. Patrick's Day.  Mike is 100% Irish - only a second generation American; both sets of grandparents found their way via boat from Ireland to America back in the 30's.  My family is also Irish, having been here since the 1790's.  It is something that is very important to me, and everyone who knows me knows that about us.  So, instead of favors, I walked around the reception after dinner with a pot of "gold" and passed out gold-foil covered chocolate coins to everyone; sharing our "treasure" with everyone. 

One bride on whose wedding I'm working absolutely dies for chocolate; and her fiance is the same way about peanut butter.  Enter the Oreo Truffle and Nutter Butter Truffle.  I know our fearless leader, Carla, is making the Oreo Truffle for her guests; I took it one step further and made a truffle from Nutter Butters with the same recipe.  The Oreo is covered in white chocolate (for the bride) and the Nutter Butter is covered in semi-sweet (for the groom).  These are small little treats that are delicious, eye-catching, and CHEAP.  One package of cookies and one package of cream cheese will set you back about $5.00 and makes approximately 42-46 1-inch truffles each.  And who doesn't love chocolate and peanut butter together?



Does the bride love butterflies and everyone knows it? Butterflies can be cut from patterned cardstock and attached to a small clothespin with a magnet on the back; use it to clip the place card to the glass at their seat and it can go on the fridge when they get home.  Where did he propose to you?  A rose garden?  Give people flower seeds with their name attached as place cards.   Another bride and groom gave away small books of poetry because they met in British Lit class in graduate school.  We are die-hard Yankees fans; needless to say, my husband's groom's cake was a big baseball.  But are you really into a particular team or sport?  Do you have a pastime you love more than anything to do together - hiking?  Antiquing?  Do you both love Japanese food?  How about chopsticks with a tag on them?  Do you adore Paris?  Make Eiffel Tower cookies and ice the outline only, placing them at each place setting.  The point is, these are the things that make you who you are together - draw on them.

Granted, not a whole lot of examples in this article, but definitely some food for thought.  The Italians use sugar-coated almonds, called 'confetti' as their main gift.  The sugar on top of the bitter almonds is a parallel to the bitterness and sweetness of life and marriage.  An appropriate sentiment, I think.  Just remember: the money you are spending is hard to come by, and your day is precious to you, so make everything about it as memorable to everyone else.  It'll be worth it.