BRONZE BUDGET BRIDE

Let's be honest; many of you have been to the wedding boutiques, Michael's, Wal-Mart, and have seen these cutesie little "kits" with their satin bags and little sample packs of what they consider necessities, charging $25 or more and they contain less than an off-the-shelf business first-aid kit.  I say hogwash.

This is the one day that you want to be prepared for anything that can happen; you want to be smart, on-the-ball, ready for a crisis with a calm head and a gleam in your eye knowing you'll knock whatever comes along out with a one-two punch and land on your satin heels without wrinkling your veil.  And they expect you to do this with a clutch that wouldn't even hold most of our wallets?  Get real.  Then get a gymbag.  Yes, a gymbag.  Your wedding emergency kit must be exactly that - an EMERGENCY kit.  Entrust it to your MOH after the two of you have filled it, checked and re-checked the list to ensure nothing is left out.

Now, fill it with the following: 
1)  2 bottles of nail polish - one clear for touch ups, runners, etc. and one in your color (if you are wearing a color);
2)  Two extra pairs of pantyhose;
3)  6 Alka-Seltzers - and 2-3 Bromo Seltzer packages (Bromo Seltzer can be purchased at any drugstore and is for pregnant women or people with aspirin allergies);
4)  Smelling salts or ammonia packs for reviving those that get a "touch of the vapors";
5)  Nail glue or super glue;
6)  Safety pins - one box of each size;
7) Push pins;
8) Deodorant;
9)  Band-aids (throw the whole box in there - you never know);
10)  Hair brush and comb;
11)  Two types of hair spray;
12)  Bobby pins and hair pins (yes, there is a difference)
13)  Hair combs or black/brown clips
14)  Tissues;
15)  Baby wipes (trust me);
16)  Lip balm;
17)  Sewing kit with several colors of thread;
18) Scissors;
19) Nail clippers AND cuticle trimmers;
20) Mirror;
21) Curling iron;
22) Q-Tips;
23) Tums/Rolaids AND Pepcid;
24) A box of quart size Ziploc baggies;
25) Breath mints;
26) Tooth paste and tooth brush and floss;
27) Spray spot remover;
28) Static guard;
29) Lotion;
30) White chalk;
31) White and black shoe polish;
32) Hair dryer;
33) Masking tape and duct tape;
34) Bottled water;
35) Baby powder;
36) Oust or Lysol;
37) White chalk;
38)  All your make-up, including eyeshadows you may not need and waterproof mascara (wedding party, remember?);
39) Benadryl and Sudaphed;
40) Aspirin, Tylenol, Excedrin, AND Advil or Motrin;
41) Cell phone;
42) Wedding party phone list;
43) Sandpaper (rub it on the bottoms of your shoes if they're new to keep from that slipping disaster that happened to Aunt Ruth);
44) Sanitary needs; and
45) Crackers with cheese and/or peanut butter, and your favorite nuts.

Why crackers and nuts?  Because one of the main things a bride forgets to do on her special day IS EAT.  You MUST have a good dose of protein prior to your wedding, at least an hour or so before.  This helps lower blood sugars, calm the jitters, and give your stomach something else to think about so you can concentrate on the wedding.  Do NOT overload on caffeine; drink mainly waters, Propel, etc.

You may say, Amy, that's a pantload of stuff.  And you'd be right.  But you can't be Wonder Woman without your toolbelt.  Chances are you won't need the majority of the things in this bag.  Do you want to take the chance and find out?  I'll let you talk to a couple of brides who didn't listen to my advice...oh, wait, can you get me Item #4?